Fancy Riding

If you live in the Midwest, you might be wondering what happened to summer.  I hate to break the news to you, but summer is over.  Gone.  Done.  Bye-bye.  Chicago is reporting its coldest October 13th in 82 years.  Here in Milwaukee we've been wallowing in 40 degree weather for days now with no relief in sight.  It seems too early for this weather, doesn't it? 

Despite the gloomy skies and chilly temperatures, this is still pretty good cycling weather.  I can get to work in the morning without being drenched in sweat.  No need to take a bath in the office bathroom sink upon my arrival to work.  My co-workers are delighted, as are the scores of unfortunates who are unlucky enough to share an elevator ride with me on my way into the office during the summer months. 

As for surviving the colder weather on the bike, I've been getting by remarkably well with a pair of mismatched Afghan wool gloves purchased from some fragrant hippie store in Berkeley back in college (I guess I used to own two pairs of these gloves in different patterns, but now I'm down to one mismatched pair) and a flimsy L.L. Bean windbreaker circa 1982. 

Not fashion plate material - I know - but it works. 

Other cyclists with better fashion sense than me (and apparantly more free time) have seized upon the cooler temperatures as an excuse to display their smart fall wardrobe while cycling.  This time of year, it's all about sweaters, boots, capes, and scarves.  Oh, and don't forget the tweed.  Fancy cyclists love tweed.  Like this "chap":

Photo by greenkozi

I was reflecting about how magical this time of year is, what with its endless fashion possibilities, when I stumbled upon this terrifying provision of the City of Milwaukee cycling ordinance:

"No rider of a bicycle shall remove both hands from the handlebars, or feet from the pedals, or practice any acrobatic or fancy riding on any street."

Now, I went to law school, so I know that the first thing to do when confronted with an undefined statutory term, such as "fancy riding", is to scan nearby provisions in order to determine if that term is defined anywhere else in the statute.  So imagine my surprise when I discovered that the term "fancy riding" is not defined by the Milwaukee ordinance.  Surely, this must have been an oversight on the part of our lawmakers.  (My guess is that the ordinance was not drafted by cyclists.)

In the absence of an express statutory definition, we are forced to rely on common usage of the term "fancy riding" in order to understand the scope of the Milwaukee ordinance.  These days, and especially at this time of the year, "fancy riding" would no doubt consist of riding around in tweed smoking a pipe.  So please restrain yourselves, fellow Milwaukee cyclists, from cycling while fancy, lest you run afoul of Milwaukee Code Section 102-8(5).  And while I'm confident that my usual commuting garb would never be accused of being fancy, there are times when I ride to the courthouse in a suit and tie.  Heck, that's even fancier than tweed!  I hope our lawmakers provide some clarification on this troubling issue in the very near future.