My Bikes (Part I)

I'm kind of a private person.  Having a blog like this is a little out of character for me, but I guess I'm getting used to it.  Actually, it's not really such a threat to my privacy needs because no one actually reads this blog anyway.  However, I really stepped out of my comfort zone during this past week when I set up a Facebook account for myself.  I know.  Everyone else has been on Facebook for the past five years already.  I've always been a late bloomer. 

One thing that I have been hesitant to do on this blog is post photos of my bikes or discuss anything gear-related.  I know that other people with bike blogs like to do those kinds of things.  Again, being a man of privacy, I have carefully avoided that level of self-exposure.  But since I went ahead and did the unthinkable by joining Facebook, I figured that I might as well bear it all here.  Also, I firmly believe that anyone can get out there and commute by bike.  It's not that hard, and you don't need fancy gear to do it.  And what better way to demonstrate that fact than by showing you photos of my positively mediocre bikes.  So here's the first in a series of three posts about my bikes (although the second and third posts may never happen). 

I have three bikes.  I know what you're thinking.  Mr. Fancy Pants Lawyer has lots of disposal income to spend on toys.  Well, let me tell you, all of my disposable income goes towards buying disposable diapers, and whatever is left over goes to the student loan mafia.  So don't get any funny ideas.  Actually, two of my bikes I found for cheap on Craigslist.  The third one I bought new at a bike shop.  Here's one of my Craigslist beauties:

This is my winter and bad weather bike.  It's a 1988 Stumpjupmer.  Since most of my major life decisions are dictated by nostalgia and weak sentimentalism, this late '80s masterpiece of mass-produced steel has a special place in my heart.  I went to college in Northern California from 1988 to 1992.  Back then, I tried desperately for about a year or so to become a hippie.  Turned out, I wasn't very good at it.  All the Berkeley hippies that I tried to emulate, however, had super-cool Specialized mountain bikes.  Mostly Rockhoppers.  A couple of trustafarians rode Stumpjumpers, but those were pricey.  These were Specialized's mid- to upper-level bikes. 

So during my first winter vacation back in L.A., I headed over to I. Martin Bicycles and bought a bike.  Actually, my dad bought it for me.  I guess I didn't make such a strong pitch to dear ol' dad because I wound up with a Hardrock - Specialized's entry-level machine.  None of my hip Berkeley buddies rode a Hardrock.  I promptly removed most of the incriminating decals off the bike, leaving only that sweet Specialized "S" intact on the headtube.  Maybe no one would notice.

Over the next few years, I rode the living snot out of that bike, even after I gave up on the idea of being a hippie.  I commuted to school and various jobs on it.  I rode it offroad on beautiful trails in the East Bay, Santa Cruz and So Cal.  It did everything I wanted.  Then, I settled down in L.A. and got married.  I had a job that required a lot of driving around, and the couple of times I tried to commute on L.A.'s westside scared me half to death, so I gave the bike - which wasn't functioning very well anymore - to a Jewish charity thrift shop on Fairfax and went on with my life. 

A year later, I was in law school in St. Louis and, nearly two thousand miles away from L.A.'s traffic, I started to miss my old Hardrock.  I wound up buying some ungainly twisted hunk of aluminum and malfunctioning shock absorbers - a mountain bike I was told - off some guy used.  I rode it through law school, but I could never get that magical feeling of vintage Specialized out of my blood.  When I moved to Milwaukee, I dumped the bike and found this old Stumpjumper on Craigslist. 

I had to put a few dollars into it to make it rideable.  It's a good commuter.  There are tons of old mountain bikes out there that can be had for not too much cash and can be made into commuter bikes.  In the winter, this bike gets Nokian studded tires for the ice and snow.  The rest of the year, I put skinnier city tires on it.  Since there is plenty of clearance for big tires on this bike, fenders are easy to install.  I have SKS 50 fenders on this one. 

The best part of this story is that I finally got the bike that would have made me the coolest rich-boy Deadhead back in Berkeley in 1988.  So what if it has 20 years worth of rust on it.  I like it like that.

Baby, You Can Drive My Bike

"Fancy riding" ban got you down?  Well, then here is a bicycle on Craigslist that you might want to consider:

As is apparent from the description provided by the seller, this bike is not ridden in the typical manner of most bicycles.  Instead, this bike is "driven."  Must be quite a unique machine!  I'm thinking that this bicycle might fall outside the scope of the Milwaukee bicycle ordinance since it is "driven" instead of ridden.  And there aren't any laws on the books banning fancy driving as far as I know.  As a lawyer, I couldn't advise you to do something so daring, but it's food for thought.

But while we're on the subject, as long as we have a ban on fancy riding, we might as well also ban fancy driving.  Frankly, fancy driving is much more of a threat to public safety than some guy riding his bike with no hands.  I can't think of anything fancier than texting your friends at the same time that you're propelling a 5,000 pound vehicle down the road at high speeds.  Can you?

Fancy Riding Revisited

I'll admit it.  I've been asleep at the handlebars.  I missed the big news.  A while ago, I commented on the absurd ban on "fancy riding" contained in Milwaukee's cycling ordinance.  I have previously shared with you how I am gripped with terror every time I ride my bike to the courthouse dressed in a suit and tie due for fear of being cited for riding while "fancy." 

So I just recently got wind of the fact that the city's Common Council had the opportunity to revisit this landmark piece of legislation last month.  Here's a link to an article in the Journal Sentinel outlining the substance of the Common Council's changes.  If you're as obsessed with silliness as I am, the first thing you'll notice about the recent changes is that the Common Council did nothing whatsoever to clarify its "fancy riding" ban.  The ban is left completely intact. 

Notwithstanding this glaring oversight, there are some positive developments coming out of the Common Council's changes to the cycling ordinance.  For instance, if you've been guiltily riding two abreast with your buddies around the streets of Milwaukee, you'll be relieved to know that that nefarious activity is now legal.  Also, the requirement to obtain a license for your bike is now ancient history.  Personally, I've been riding around with that black cloud over my head ever since I arrived in Milwaukee. 

I think the Common Council missed a golden opportunity, however, by failing to explain the scope of its "fancy riding" ban.  I will continue riding my bike to the courthouse in my suit and tie regardless, but it looks like I'll never know whether doing so is illegal.  I guess life involves some degree of risk-taking.  There is a silver lining, though.  At the very least, the city's continuing ban on "fancy riding" will ensure that Milwaukee will not play host to a "tweed ride" anytime in the near future.  And that's a good thing. 

It's a January Thaw!

I have been remiss in my blogging duties lately.  I'm not sure how it happened.  I got busy at work, and then I just sort of forgot about this blog.  My computer at work broke and I got a new one that didn't have all my passwords saved as "cookies" or whatever they're called.  I couldn't remember my Blogger password.  I came up with some other good excuses for not blogging, but I can't remember them offhand right now.

However, today something exciting happened that reminded me that I used to write silly things here about riding my bike.  After two colds months of making my lonely commute into downtown from Milwaukee's westside, I finally saw another bike commuter this morning.  I was thrilled.  I felt like I had run into an old friend.  Well, I guess, some old friends you don't want to run into.  That's why they have fallen into the "old friend" category to begin with.  So let's just say that seeing another commuter this morning was like running into an old friend that I actually wanted to see. 

After this brief encounter, I thought to myself, "Gee...it sure would be nice to see more people out cycling."  I don't want to sound preachy, but now is a really good time to get your bike out for ride if you've spent the past couple of months hiding indoors.  Predictions indicate 30+ degree weather for the next week.  The city streets are mostly clear of that white garbage (some people call it "snow") that fell out of the sky last week.  It's really quite pleasant out.  Take advantage of it.  It will be cold and miserable again soon enough.